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Aug. 5th, 2004 12:44 amSo, I wear the same 'uniform' to work every day for two and a half months. Khakis and a short sleeved shirt of some sort, usually a dressy t-shirt. And then last week, after a) a hellish week before on many levels and b) total lack of interest in many things due to the hell week and the ditching by KB, I wore whatever I felt like. Still not trashy looking--cargo khakis and a heather grey t-shirt, a black velvet skirt, various other slightly less dressy things. still at least the level of the boys who are wearing jeans and denim and t-shirts and the like, depending on the exact boy (new office boy is well dressed, old office boy is a little less so, I think, and the boy with a thing for japanese girls the least fancy. No one says anything, and then yesterday while I was working in the boys' room (the office with the office boys working there), one of them says something about me being dressed up again. gah. 2.5 months, dressed better than them, and I get "must be nice to wear business clothes again."
after a few days lapse into a more casual business casual. oh, can we say bite me, boys and girls? I think we can. Turned out, from the conversation I had with that boy while a group of us went to Dunkin Donuts for coffee that he actually did mean it as a compliment. I would know this because?
One of my housemates, after I mentioned something about KB, said, "You have a special sort of relationship with him, don't you," and I froze like a deer in the headlights. Of course, she just meant that he yells at me for missing meals. (I skipped lunch, in part due to one of the boys, who'd borrowed my keycard and didn't get it back to me for ages, and partly because I wasn't really hungry.)
I was supposed to have gone out for coffee with his friend some time this week, but no luck so far, and I don't know that he'll have time before he leaves. Which does make me sad. I like him--not like-like, but if he was staying in Boston, I'd probably date him, at least a couple of times--he's funny, he's so cute, he's sweet, and he has a southern accent. What's not to like? He is younger than me, and some part of me is always sure that others can tell when we're out together that he's just barely past legal drinking age (a year), and that they're going to, I don't know, stop me and yell at me for being with someone too young and too cute for me. I get similar fears with KB--not the age, for some reason, but I'm always sure other people look at us and try and figure out why he's walking with me, and if they think, 'he could do so much better than her." I dress up when we're going out anywhere in public when I'm with the boy, wear my good jeans and a belt, find a work t-shirt or one of my nice tank tops, make sure my hair looks good. Cause I know that everyone looks at me, and I know I lose. And some of it is insecurity, but some of it is just plain honesty--he's gorgeous, and i'm short and chunky looking, possibly even more so now that my clothing doesn't fit anymore. I'm hoping to get to cambridge on Saturday, as I want to hit a thrift shop over there and get at least *something* that fits me. I wish I could just nip home for a minute, so I could find my DC work clothes, which I carefully set aside for just this contingency, but then my mom cleaned up my room, and now she can't tell where they are.
after a few days lapse into a more casual business casual. oh, can we say bite me, boys and girls? I think we can. Turned out, from the conversation I had with that boy while a group of us went to Dunkin Donuts for coffee that he actually did mean it as a compliment. I would know this because?
One of my housemates, after I mentioned something about KB, said, "You have a special sort of relationship with him, don't you," and I froze like a deer in the headlights. Of course, she just meant that he yells at me for missing meals. (I skipped lunch, in part due to one of the boys, who'd borrowed my keycard and didn't get it back to me for ages, and partly because I wasn't really hungry.)
I was supposed to have gone out for coffee with his friend some time this week, but no luck so far, and I don't know that he'll have time before he leaves. Which does make me sad. I like him--not like-like, but if he was staying in Boston, I'd probably date him, at least a couple of times--he's funny, he's so cute, he's sweet, and he has a southern accent. What's not to like? He is younger than me, and some part of me is always sure that others can tell when we're out together that he's just barely past legal drinking age (a year), and that they're going to, I don't know, stop me and yell at me for being with someone too young and too cute for me. I get similar fears with KB--not the age, for some reason, but I'm always sure other people look at us and try and figure out why he's walking with me, and if they think, 'he could do so much better than her." I dress up when we're going out anywhere in public when I'm with the boy, wear my good jeans and a belt, find a work t-shirt or one of my nice tank tops, make sure my hair looks good. Cause I know that everyone looks at me, and I know I lose. And some of it is insecurity, but some of it is just plain honesty--he's gorgeous, and i'm short and chunky looking, possibly even more so now that my clothing doesn't fit anymore. I'm hoping to get to cambridge on Saturday, as I want to hit a thrift shop over there and get at least *something* that fits me. I wish I could just nip home for a minute, so I could find my DC work clothes, which I carefully set aside for just this contingency, but then my mom cleaned up my room, and now she can't tell where they are.
