(no subject)

[tanaise]

I felt icky sunday, of course. I always feel sick meeting days, and I swear I don't plan this (okay, technically last meeting I didn't do anything on purpose to create the sickness but I also didn't take steps to avoid feeling sick, so I got walloped with a sinus headache from my allergies.) But yesterday i decided that even if I was queasy to start with, eating two green nectarines would make me feel better. Yeah, not the smartest thing to do. And then I had potato salad for dinner, which also didn't help. I thought that it was ultimately just allergies--when i took a sudafed and a decongestant, I felt better almost immediately. But today, I'm not so sure. The allergies were one thing, but the reason I felt like I was sick on sunday was that I was *ridiculously* depressed over something stupid Saturday night--my social anxiety, which is an issue, but which is not as big of an issue as I was acting like it was. So I didn't start my day off very well yesterday, and today I think I must still be getting sick because I'm just beyond apathetic today, and heading towards pathetic.

I also think I've forgotten how to sit properly, or how to sleep properly, or any number of things like that. I get random pins and needles in one spot on my leg when I move from seated to standing. My back has hurt more than I'm used to (which would be not at all lately since i got the new matress topper) when I wake up, and I keep catching myself doing all of the stupidest things lately at work--my keyboard is pushed all the way back against my cube wall so I have to lean forward (which also tends to make one hand go to sleep), and i keep sliding my legs off the sides of the chair, instead of the front, which just makes my hips hurt. I do this every so often, so I don't know what I need to learn to do things without hurting myself. Pain is supposed to teach me not to do things that hurt, but it doesn't seem an effective deternant lately.