alas, no nookie
Aug. 6th, 2004 12:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tanaiseFirst date--really, honest to god spelled out in advance date--in 12 years.
it wasn't planned in advance, at least not specifically planned in advance. I'd asked him last night when if he still wanted to go, basically so I'd know if i should stop expecting it, and he was flatteringly prompt to insist that yes, he was still interested in going for coffee. And then i watched him basically flip through his social calendar mentally and come up with no openings, and he stuttered to a stop. "well, I do want to go too," I said, "so just keep it in mind if you get free time."
And tonight at dinner (bbqed tofu with fresh off-the-cob corn and crisp green beans in with the sauce, barley with cider soaked onions and lacchinato kale, and a salad with a cranberry vingarette) he was looking just *so* fine. Deep blue shirt, just exactly the right color for him. I think he should wear it all the time.
So after dinner (and yes, Chance, I admired his shirt several times. Well, him in the shirt, to be exact), I was thinking about going out for a walk, but instead got distracted and thought about writing for a bit and chatted with Jane for a while. And there was a knock on the door, and I said 'come in," and looked up and it was him. And he didn't say anything, just moved into the room so i could see him check his watch. And look at me. And I was so confused. And he jerked his head towards the door, and looked at me again, and a little lightbulb went off, and I said, "oh, now? Is it open?" and he nodded, and I jumped up and left the room after him. I warned him that I was broke, and he made the appropriate gesture to signify that he was paying, and then I tripped over the brick in the doorway and nearly flattened him, and broke his silence when he worried about me. I had to come back up to the room to get my keys and belt (that's how fancy he deserves--I wore a belt!) (and brushed my teeth, shhhh).
And we walked down to Paneficio, and he mentioned having had a day that he'd wished could have just stopped at 5 pm, and I claimed it was because of coffee with me, and he disagreed with that, and gradually told me the reason why--general ickiness aflicting friends that he couldn't help with, and i knew exactly what he meant, and just wanted to hug him for that, cause he'd get all sad feeling by me for a moment. And we got there, and ordered, and I even got a pastry, and he paid for it (see, just like a real date--I told you). We sat down, and he said something odd. he said, "tell me about your childhood." I just sort of looked at him, and he said, "You've said some things about growing up that just made me curious," and I asked him to specify, and he said he wouldn't cause I'd get annoyed with him if he did, and asked a question about if my parents were quaker, and I started talking. And I dropped crumbs of pastry all over myself and the place, and I talked most of the time, and he still smiled at me and looked interested when I was talking, and maybe I should only flirt with southern boys from now on, cause damn if they aren't sweeties.
We did talk about things other than myself. After the first few questions, I'd use my life as sort of an introduction to a discussion topic--I'd tell a story from it, and see if he had something to comment on about it, and he often did, and they were good comments and thoughtful ones, and I really wish he wasn't leaving so soon. I didn't touch him much--we were a little too far away for that to be easy. And on the one hand, he's going back to NC on Sunday, and I'm sad cause if he stayed up here, I think I really would date him. I'm not thinking we'd live happily ever after, but we're similar in enough ways that I think it would be interesting, and he's hot, and he likes me, and I'm pretty sure that's all that's needed for justification to date. but on the other hand, I"m thinking maybe I could handle this whole dating thing, cause it was less scary than I thought it could be. I don't know. We'll have to see.
it wasn't planned in advance, at least not specifically planned in advance. I'd asked him last night when if he still wanted to go, basically so I'd know if i should stop expecting it, and he was flatteringly prompt to insist that yes, he was still interested in going for coffee. And then i watched him basically flip through his social calendar mentally and come up with no openings, and he stuttered to a stop. "well, I do want to go too," I said, "so just keep it in mind if you get free time."
And tonight at dinner (bbqed tofu with fresh off-the-cob corn and crisp green beans in with the sauce, barley with cider soaked onions and lacchinato kale, and a salad with a cranberry vingarette) he was looking just *so* fine. Deep blue shirt, just exactly the right color for him. I think he should wear it all the time.
So after dinner (and yes, Chance, I admired his shirt several times. Well, him in the shirt, to be exact), I was thinking about going out for a walk, but instead got distracted and thought about writing for a bit and chatted with Jane for a while. And there was a knock on the door, and I said 'come in," and looked up and it was him. And he didn't say anything, just moved into the room so i could see him check his watch. And look at me. And I was so confused. And he jerked his head towards the door, and looked at me again, and a little lightbulb went off, and I said, "oh, now? Is it open?" and he nodded, and I jumped up and left the room after him. I warned him that I was broke, and he made the appropriate gesture to signify that he was paying, and then I tripped over the brick in the doorway and nearly flattened him, and broke his silence when he worried about me. I had to come back up to the room to get my keys and belt (that's how fancy he deserves--I wore a belt!) (and brushed my teeth, shhhh).
And we walked down to Paneficio, and he mentioned having had a day that he'd wished could have just stopped at 5 pm, and I claimed it was because of coffee with me, and he disagreed with that, and gradually told me the reason why--general ickiness aflicting friends that he couldn't help with, and i knew exactly what he meant, and just wanted to hug him for that, cause he'd get all sad feeling by me for a moment. And we got there, and ordered, and I even got a pastry, and he paid for it (see, just like a real date--I told you). We sat down, and he said something odd. he said, "tell me about your childhood." I just sort of looked at him, and he said, "You've said some things about growing up that just made me curious," and I asked him to specify, and he said he wouldn't cause I'd get annoyed with him if he did, and asked a question about if my parents were quaker, and I started talking. And I dropped crumbs of pastry all over myself and the place, and I talked most of the time, and he still smiled at me and looked interested when I was talking, and maybe I should only flirt with southern boys from now on, cause damn if they aren't sweeties.
We did talk about things other than myself. After the first few questions, I'd use my life as sort of an introduction to a discussion topic--I'd tell a story from it, and see if he had something to comment on about it, and he often did, and they were good comments and thoughtful ones, and I really wish he wasn't leaving so soon. I didn't touch him much--we were a little too far away for that to be easy. And on the one hand, he's going back to NC on Sunday, and I'm sad cause if he stayed up here, I think I really would date him. I'm not thinking we'd live happily ever after, but we're similar in enough ways that I think it would be interesting, and he's hot, and he likes me, and I'm pretty sure that's all that's needed for justification to date. but on the other hand, I"m thinking maybe I could handle this whole dating thing, cause it was less scary than I thought it could be. I don't know. We'll have to see.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
alas, no nookie
Date: 2004-08-05 11:12 pm (UTC)But I read it anyway.
Yay for dating!
Re: alas, no nookie
Date: 2004-08-06 07:05 am (UTC)Re: alas, no nookie
Date: 2004-08-06 09:37 am (UTC)Trent
no subject
Date: 2004-08-06 12:05 am (UTC)Yay You!
no subject
Date: 2004-08-06 05:07 am (UTC)Not everyone finds this to be a bad thing, I suppose.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-06 07:49 am (UTC)And oddly enough, I think I believe superlatives more than I believe northern compliments. Because the Northern, "pretty okay," is easy to write off as just saying something to be polite, whereas clearly you can't take *all* of the southern compliment, but even if you knock it back a notch or two, it's still a compliment.
I'm still not very good at compliments in general though--I don't trust them because I know how I look--I've got a mirror, for heaven's sake--and I haven't gotten many from people I'm not friends with, so it's still odd to live in a house where people say my hair looks nice, or like the one guy in the house who said he bet I was cute as anything having temper tatrums when I was 5. just...weird.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-06 08:21 am (UTC)I evaluate compliments literally and only literally. That is, if someone tells me "that shirt looks pretty decent on you," I estimate the likelihood that that's the case; if someone tells me, "you are drop-dead gorgeous!", I estimate the likelihood that that's the case. I don't knock things back notches. I decide that the specific, mild person might just have something there, whereas the general, superlative person is likely fulla shit and/or being sarcastic. (I assume that "gorgeous" means I spilled something on my skirt and "brilliant" means I just did something incredibly dumb. Then again, my mom's way of telling me she thinks something looks cute is to say that it makes my ass look huge, so.)
I know what you mean about taking compliments in general.
Yay date!
Date: 2004-08-06 10:54 am (UTC)Hee!
Date: 2004-08-06 07:40 am (UTC)- D
no subject
Date: 2004-08-06 07:09 pm (UTC)Coolness!
Date??
Date: 2004-08-10 08:39 am (UTC)Re: Date??
Date: 2004-08-10 12:58 pm (UTC)