Social

[tanaise]

I wonder if I'm just too subtle in life, along with in fiction. I mean, I get accused to starting conversations in medias res all the time--it's not in the middle, it's just skipping all the boring stuff. Or possibly it's related to how much I analyze my life--I'm always trying to figure out if I"m acting correctly, by observing others and by going over what I said, and how others responded.

I'm seriously socially inept. I still make the sort of stupid slip ups that are so damn obvious in retrospect, so I still go over everything I've said, and everyone I've said it too, just to make sure I haven't messed up. And perhaps because I spend so much attention on things I see more nuances in my behavior than others see in it. So where I see blatant, others just see, well, me.

Comments

[tikimama.livejournal.com]

I do that, too. I always have running conversations in my head (ones that I've been in (revising what I said, etc) or ones that might happen). I think I'm socially adept, but I am concerned with how people perceive me: I want to be thought of as witty and clever.

Things that I perceive that I did "wrong" in a situation (saying the wrong thing, making the wrong gesture) haunt me far past the time when I should have let them go.

And I love that you start things in the middle. Craig does that, too. I've always thought its because he (perhaps like you) have already practised in his head what he's going to say, so he just skips to the good part.